అత్తవారింటికి అల్లుడైనా కావాలి, ఆబోతైనా కావాలి.

attavarintiki alludaina kavali, abotaina kavali.

Translation

To the mother-in-law's house, one should go either as a son-in-law or as a bull.

Meaning

This proverb is used sarcastically to describe someone who expects to be pampered and fed without doing any work. In traditional Telugu culture, a son-in-law is treated with extreme hospitality and never asked to work, while a 'Basavanna' (sacred bull) is fed and revered without labor. It is used to mock lazy individuals who overstay their welcome and expect royal treatment.

Related Phrases

Either a backyard garden wall is needed, or a husband who is a smooth talker is needed.

This proverb highlights the necessity of protection or advocacy. Just as a wall protects a crop (madi) from intruders or animals, a clever or articulate husband protects his family from being taken advantage of by society. It is used to suggest that one needs either physical security or a clever person to handle external worldly affairs effectively.

One should eat like a breeding bull among cows and like a son-in-law at the mother-in-law's house.

This proverb highlights the special treatment and abundance one receives in specific roles. Just as a breeding bull (Abotu) gets the best fodder among the herd, a son-in-law is traditionally treated with the highest hospitality and served the finest food at his in-laws' home. It is used to describe someone enjoying a position of privilege and indulgence.

Either be a beggar or a millionaire.

This proverb suggests that in life, it is better to be at one extreme or the other rather than being stuck in the middle. It emphasizes that both a person with nothing to lose and a person with immense resources have a certain type of freedom or power, whereas those in the middle often face the most struggles and anxieties.

One should either be a courageous person or a humble person.

This expression suggests that in life, to survive or succeed, one must possess either the strength and courage (Dheerudu) to face challenges head-on or the humility and submissiveness (Deenudu) to seek help and stay protected. It implies that being stuck in the middle with an ego but no strength is a recipe for failure. It is often used to advise someone on the attitude they should adopt depending on their circumstances.

Either a medicine is needed, or a push is needed

This expression refers to a situation where a result can only be achieved through two specific means: either by treating the root cause (medicine) or by applying external pressure/motivation (a push). It is often used when someone is being stubborn or a task is stalled, suggesting that either a logical solution or a forceful nudge is required to get things moving.

Either a widow's son or a king's son is needed.

This proverb highlights the importance of having influence or survival skills to navigate the world. A king's son has power and resources through his status, while a widow's son is often perceived as someone who has grown up tough, resourceful, and street-smart out of necessity. It implies that to succeed or get things done, one needs either authority or grit.

Even if it is just a spoonful, it should give strength; even if it is a whole granary, it should be consumed.

This proverb emphasizes the importance of quality over quantity, while also highlighting that resources are meant to be used. It suggests that a small amount of nutritious or high-quality food is better than a large amount of useless filler. In a broader sense, it means that whatever we possess should serve its purpose effectively.

One must be either a courageous person or a humble seeker.

This expression emphasizes that in life, one should either possess great courage and strength (Dheera) to face challenges independently or have the humility (Deena) to surrender and seek help or divine grace. It suggests that being in an indecisive middle ground or being arrogant without strength leads to failure.

One must either be the son of a king or the brother of a courtesan.

This proverb refers to the privilege of living a life of leisure and luxury without manual labor. It suggests that such a comfortable lifestyle is typically reserved for those born into royalty (power/wealth) or those who live off the earnings and influence of someone highly sought after (historically referring to the status of a 'Sani' or courtesan's family members who were often pampered). It is used to describe someone who enjoys benefits without working for them.

[Placing] a guard over a forest. Attempting impossibilities.

This phrase refers to a person who is assigned to watch over a specific corner or a border area. In a broader metaphorical sense, it is often used to describe someone who is protective of their territory or a person who holds a position of oversight in a specific niche or remote area.