పెడితే పెళ్లి, పెట్టకుంటే పెడాకులు

pedite pelli, pettakunte pedakulu

Translation

If served, it is a wedding; if not, it is a divorce.

Meaning

This proverb describes a fickle or opportunistic mindset. It refers to people who are only friendly and supportive as long as they are receiving benefits or being favored (represented by the wedding feast), but immediately turn hostile or sever ties when those benefits stop (represented by divorce). It highlights how some relationships are based solely on self-interest rather than genuine loyalty.

Related Phrases

When asked to speak auspicious words, the groom said all the married women at the wedding are his senior wives.

This proverb is used to describe a person who says something incredibly foolish, offensive, or inappropriate when asked to speak or act properly. It highlights the irony of someone ruining a positive situation by being tactless or utterly lacking common sense.

If given, it's a wedding; if not, it's total destruction.

This expression describes an extreme, 'all or nothing' attitude or a situation that results in either a grand celebration or complete ruin. It is often used to characterize people who are unpredictable and prone to overreacting—becoming overly generous when happy but destructive or hostile when they don't get their way.

If you give him butter he cannot swallow it, if you give him your finger he cannot bite it.

This expression is used to describe a person who appears extremely innocent, naive, or passive to the point of being helpless or dull-witted. It often refers to someone who lacks the basic initiative or reaction expected in common situations.

As demure as if butter would not melt in his mouth, and yet cheese will not choke him.

If you live until I die, I'll get you married. A jocular saying.

This expression is used to describe a sarcastic or impossible promise. It highlights a logical paradox where the condition for something to happen (staying alive until death) makes the outcome (marriage) impossible or redundant, often used to mock someone making empty or deceptive commitments.

If given, a wedding; if not, crackers.

This expression is used to describe a situation where someone is extremely demanding or fickle. It implies that if things go their way, they will celebrate (a wedding), but if they don't get what they want, they will create chaos or break relationships (crackers/explosions). It describes an 'all or nothing' or 'my way or the highway' attitude.

A woman who does not give [ alms ] will never give ; what evil has happened to the jade who does give ?

This proverb describes a person who neither does a good deed themselves nor allows others to do it. It is used to criticize dog-in-the-manger behavior where someone obstructs progress or charity despite having no intention of contributing themselves.

Said by a beggar of one from whom he generally received alms.

If you give, [I shall consider there is ] a marriage [in your house] and if you don't give, a funeral.

This expression describes a situation where things go smoothly as long as a person's demands or conditions are met, but the moment they are denied, they cause chaos or break the relationship. It is used to characterize fickle or demanding people who create trouble when they don't get their way.

The impertinent speech of a beggar. ఈ.

If given, it's a marriage; if not, it's shattered pieces.

This proverb describes a fickle or opportunistic person who is pleasant and supportive only as long as they receive favors or benefits. If their demands are met, everything is celebrated (like a wedding); if not, they turn hostile and create trouble (represented by the sound of crackers or destruction).

Will the wedding not happen if the legs are hidden?

This proverb is used to point out that minor obstacles or petty attempts to hinder a process cannot stop an inevitable or major event from occurring. Historically, it refers to a ritual where if someone tries to hide the groom's feet or shoes to delay the wedding, the ceremony will still proceed eventually.

If you feast me [I shall consider it] a marriage and if not, a funeral.

This expression describes a person with a fickle or opportunistic nature who praises you when you provide them with benefits but turns hostile and curses you the moment you stop. It highlights extreme inconsistency in behavior based solely on self-interest.

Fair and foul words.