అక్క పగ, బావ మంచి.

akka paga, bava manchi.

Translation

Sister's grudge and brother-in-law's kindness.

Meaning

This proverb describes a situation where one person (like an elder sister) holds a grudge or is stern, while another closely related person (like the brother-in-law) is kind and accommodating. It is used to illustrate contrasting behaviors within a family or a team, often implying that the kindness of one might be a facade or ineffective due to the hostility of the other.

Related Phrases

The sister is ours, but is the sisters's husband ours also ?

This proverb highlights that personal relationships do not automatically extend to third parties or transfer ownership/loyalty. It is used to caution against over-relying on someone just because they are related to a close person of yours, emphasizing that their interests or loyalties might still remain separate.

When addressed affectionately as brother-in-law, he invited her to bed.

This proverb describes a situation where someone takes undue advantage of friendliness or intimacy. It is used when a person mistakes a polite or affectionate gesture for a weakness and responds with an inappropriate or overstepping demand. It highlights the behavior of individuals who lack boundaries and exploit a relationship's closeness.

Mother is good, but her serving ladle is not.

This proverb is used to describe a situation where a person is inherently kind or well-intentioned, but the resources they provide or the way they allocate things is insufficient or harsh. It specifically refers to how a mother loves her child, but when she uses the ladle (teddu) to serve food, the portions might be small or the discipline might be firm. It is applied to people who are good at heart but stingy or strict in their actions.

When called a good man, he made holes all over the cot.

This proverb describes a situation where someone takes undue advantage of the praise or kindness shown to them. It refers to people who, when trusted or given freedom due to their 'good' reputation, end up causing damage or acting irresponsibly. It is used to caution against blind trust or to describe someone who lacks common sense despite being called 'good'.

To a lean man, a wealthy man is a brother-in-law; to a wealthy man, a lean man is also a brother-in-law.

This proverb highlights the reciprocity and equality inherent in kinship and relationships, regardless of economic status. In Telugu culture, 'Bava' (brother-in-law) denotes a close relative. The saying suggests that blood relations or social bonds remain the same regardless of one person being rich (balisinavadu) and the other being poor (bakkavadu). It is used to emphasize that status shouldn't change how family members treat or address one another.

When someone tired and exhausted came to sleep beside their sister, she picked them up and put them beside the brother-in-law.

This proverb is used to describe a situation where someone seeks comfort, relief, or help from a trusted person, but instead of finding rest, they are pushed into a more difficult, uncomfortable, or awkward situation. It highlights the irony of getting additional trouble instead of the expected solace.

A snake's grudge, a tail's kinship

This proverb is used to describe deep-seated, long-lasting enmity. It implies that just as a snake is believed to carry a grudge for a long time, some rivalries are permanent and cannot be easily resolved. It is often used to warn someone about an unforgiving enemy who waits for the right moment to strike.

Everything is only for our good.

Normally used in comforting someone, the statement indicates that acceptance of what befalls one is a positive attitude. Worrying about what is unavoidable serves no purpose. One should realize what will be, will be.

Call me brother-in-law anywhere, but do not call me brother-in-law in the brinjal garden

This proverb highlights hypocrisy or situational convenience. It refers to someone who wants to maintain a relationship or friendship in public but refuses to acknowledge it when there is work to be done or when their personal interests (like guarding a harvest) are at stake. It is used to describe people who are friendly only when it doesn't cost them anything.

The sister's anxiety is in vain; the brother-in-law will not survive.

This proverb describes a situation where despite someone's intense efforts, concern, or desire to save something, the outcome is already inevitable or the situation is beyond repair. It is used to point out that some efforts are futile because the core problem is terminal or unfixable.