కొడుకు మనవాడైతే కోడలు మనదౌతుందా

koduku manavadaite kodalu manadautunda

Translation

If the son is ours, will the daughter-in-law also become ours?

Meaning

This proverb is used to express the reality that one's influence or claim over their own children does not automatically extend to their children's spouses. It highlights the natural distance or lack of blood relation between a person and their daughter-in-law, suggesting that one cannot expect the same level of loyalty or belonging from her as they do from their son.

Related Phrases

The sister is ours, but is the sisters's husband ours also ?

This proverb highlights that personal relationships do not automatically extend to third parties or transfer ownership/loyalty. It is used to caution against over-relying on someone just because they are related to a close person of yours, emphasizing that their interests or loyalties might still remain separate.

The daughter-in-law of a wealthy family will not stop being proud.

This proverb describes a person who shows off or displays pride because of their wealth, status, or influential background. It is used to point out that those with abundant resources or support often act with a certain level of confidence, elegance, or arrogance that they find difficult to hide.

Even if the son is ours, will the daughter-in-law become ours?

This expression highlights the inherent distance or difference in perspective felt toward someone who enters a family from the outside. It is used to suggest that despite biological or legal ties, a newcomer (like a daughter-in-law) might not share the same deep-rooted loyalty or belonging as one's own children, or that family dynamics change significantly after marriage.

A widow's son is a son, a king's son is a son. A king's son and a widow's son are both greatly indulged.

This proverb highlights that fate or luck favors two extremes: either those who have nothing to lose and must work extremely hard (the widow's son) or those who are born with immense privilege (the king's son). It is used to describe how people at the very bottom of the social ladder and the very top often end up being the most successful or influential, albeit for different reasons.

The son is a darling, while the daughter-in-law is a blockhead.

This proverb reflects a common human bias and double standard within families. It highlights how parents often overlook their own child's faults (viewing them with affection) while being overly critical, dismissive, or insensitive toward their daughter-in-law's efforts and intelligence.

The son must flourish, and the daughter-in-law must become a widow.

This proverb describes a paradoxical or impossible desire, highlighting human selfishness or hypocrisy. Since a woman can only become a widow if her husband (the son) dies, wishing for both simultaneously is a logical contradiction. It is used to mock people who want all the benefits for themselves without accepting the necessary consequences, or those who harbor ill will that would ultimately hurt their own interests.

They are sons only while being birthed and raised; are they still sons once the daughters-in-law arrive?

This proverb reflects a cynical or traditional social observation about how sons often change their priorities or distance themselves from their parents after getting married. It is used to express the disappointment of parents who feel neglected by their sons due to the influence of their wives (daughters-in-law).

The bridegroom is ours, but his earrings are not ours.

This proverb is used to describe a situation where someone or something might be closely related to you or under your control, but the resources or assets they possess belong to someone else. It highlights the distinction between personal relationships and ownership of property, or a situation where one's authority is limited despite a close connection.

For a good word, everyone is ours.

This proverb emphasizes that kind speech and pleasant behavior can win over anyone. If you speak politely and kindly, the whole world becomes your kin, whereas harsh words alienate even close friends.

The son is great, but the daughter-in-law is thin (small)

This proverb is used to describe a biased attitude where parents overlook their own son's faults or give him excessive credit while being overly critical, dismissive, or demanding toward the daughter-in-law. It highlights the unequal treatment and double standards often found in family dynamics.